This may be why 2-year olds don't usually pick out their own clothes. Let Mommy take a shower and look what Daddy allows. The pink boots are a favorite of Audrey. She likes to wear them all the time. And I usually let her. Picking my battles, that is what it's called.

My Bean is growing up. She now says "Skunk" whereas she used to say "snunk". For example, "I smell a snunk, you smell dat? I not like snunks." I have to remind myself that she is just two. She acts older most times. Then there are those times where she definitely acts her age - she loves talking like a baby and crying for no reason. She has become very good at making herself cry. She has to work at it a bit but she is good.

Alex is doing good riding his bike. It took him a while to decide that using the pedals was faster than pushing himself. Watching Audrey ride his tricycle was all the motivation he needed. Oh how I love the motivation he has to beat his sister. Things that are not a race become an Olympic event. Walking in the store - he gets there first so he wins; eating food - he wins because he takes the first bite. Prayer time is the best (um, not really) he and Audrey will each melt down if they do not get to pray first for our food. Rarely do we have a winner. And then when Alex wins at the other "events" it ultimately leads to an argument about who was really first. Inevitably I become the referee who declares a tie. Soon that isn't going to work as a solution.

Alex now tells people that he is "close to five." True - he is. He is a very smart 4-year old. He and Audrey have taken up painting with watercolors. Thank you, Aunt Em. They love it and are pretty good. Alex also loves to play with our next door neighbor, Tyler. Tyler is 4 just like Alex. Alex keeps a log of how often I have "allowed" him to go to Tyler's house to jump on the trampoline. Never mind the fact that for some time before he played on the trampoline he always said no when he was asked to come over. Somehow that translates into my never letting him play on it except for three times (now four if you count today). Funny how he can remember how many times he has jumped on the trampoline compared to what I just told him to pick up.

Tomorrow, or rather today since it is after midnight, marks 7 weeks since Anaiya's birth and butterfly wings. The sad times seem to come out of nowhere. I really wish that my children did not have to ask me why I am sad. Of course, they ask that if I have just sneezed or coughed, too. The worst part for me right now is the fact that I have nothing physical to remind me of her except for my hips :). It might sound weird but it feels as if it never happened until I look at the pictures. We have her pictures up around the house. I am so thankful that we found Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep to take pictures. The times when it feels so distant the pictures remind me that she was real. It hurts but at least I have something to attribute my sadness to. The sadness isn't too bad most times. It does not overwhelm me. I wish things had been different but they weren't so we continue on. I think my compassion threshold has been increased tenfold. I have learned that loving and losing is definitely better than not loving at all. I have also learned that "His compassions they fail not. They are new every morning. Great is Thy faithfulness" Lam. 3:22-23. Thank the Lord that doesn't hinge on MY feelings.

Another day has gone. Today we painted, played outside, jumped on the trampoline, stomped in puddles, ate hot dogs and mac-n-cheese, blew bubbles, played a bit of Wii, watched Bob the Builder, sang karaoke style songs on the TV, wrestled with each other, ate the neighbors' popsicles, and took a nap (or took a fake nap if you were Alex). All in a day's work.